5 Things to Say “NO” To This November

The holiday season often comes with a laundry list of "shoulds"—from lavish parties to decking the halls to perfection. But what if this November, you committed to saying NO to a few holiday obligations that don’t truly serve you? By scaling back, you can find more joy, connection, and calm in the things that matter most. Here are five things to say NO to this November to bring simplicity, balance, and happiness into the holidays.

1. Say NO to Holiday Cards

Sending holiday cards can be a time-consuming task, often adding unnecessary pressure to “get it right” with a perfect family photo or heartfelt message. This year, give yourself permission to skip the cards if they feel more like a chore than a joy. Instead, opt for a group text, video message, or social media post to spread the holiday cheer without the stress. If you still want to send something, consider a simple digital card, which is both eco-friendly and effortless.

 Alternative Idea: Use the time you’d spend writing and addressing cards to catch up in person or over the phone with close friends or family. This makes for more meaningful connections without the holiday rush.

2. Say NO to Traveling

Traveling during the holiday season can be expensive, stressful, and hectic. Packed airports, winter weather delays, and holiday surcharges can turn a family visit into an ordeal. Consider celebrating locally, perhaps with a “staycation” or a gathering at home with friends or neighbors. If family time is important, look into hosting a virtual gathering where everyone can join in from the comfort of their homes.

 Alternative Idea: Plan a less stressful trip in the off-season when prices are lower, and the crowds have thinned. This can be a great way to bond with family without the holiday rush.

3. Say NO to Overspending

The season’s endless sales can tempt anyone to overspend, but a mountain of gifts often just adds stress—both financially and physically. Overspending often detracts from the real spirit of the holidays, which is about connection, gratitude, and giving from the heart. Set a budget and stick to it. Look for meaningful, less costly gifts or consider homemade options that add a personal touch without breaking the bank.

Alternative Idea: Arrange a family Secret Santa, or a “no-gifts” holiday where you all share an experience instead. You might be surprised at how these moments create lasting memories without a hefty price tag.

4. Say NO to Outdated Traditions

Not every tradition needs to be honored forever, especially if it no longer brings you joy. Whether it's baking dozens of cookies, putting up extensive decorations, or attending The Nutcracker, consider letting go of traditions that don’t resonate with you anymore. Choose a few that bring genuine happiness and ditch the rest. This way, you’ll have more energy for what truly matters to you.

Alternative Idea: Start a new tradition that fits your current lifestyle. You could have a cozy movie night at home, a winter hike, or even a “holiday reset day” with spa treatments and self-care. Embrace what feels authentic to you.

5. Say NO to Perfection

Perfection can be the biggest holiday stressor of all. Trying to have the “perfect” meal, décor, or family gathering is often unrealistic and exhausting. Instead, allow yourself to embrace an imperfect holiday. The holidays are about togetherness, joy, and gratitude—not flawless place settings and color-coordinated gift wrap.

Alternative Idea: Reframe your expectations and focus on the moments instead of the aesthetics. Let go of any pressure to have everything look or feel a certain way. Sometimes, it’s the unexpected moments that make the best memories.

Saying NO to holiday obligations isn’t about being negative; it’s about making space for what truly matters to you. By saying NO things that don’t “fit” you’re saying YES to a holiday that brings you peace, joy, and connection. This November, give yourself permission to redefine the holidays on your own terms.